The Last Month ~

I am almost onto my 37th week of pregnancy. Two days ago I had some false labor contractions and prelabor symptoms. The contractions were crampy and I had three in an hour. I was kinda nervous. Was this the beginning? Nope. They let up. After calling the nurse and getting anxious I just decided to forget about the contractions until they start to get more frequent and more painful. It's not like I don't know what that feels like. But I have to say that this pregnancy has been different then Hannah's. Everything seemed to happen and progress much quicker. I don't remember having contractions til 2 weeks before she came. They weren't crampy or sore until I was in labor.

These warning signs, however, have really gotten me motivated to finish last minute things before he comes. I wrote a list of 10 things I wanted to have done before he was born. I showed them to Brian and asked him to help me. He is a sweetheart. And a task oriented person thank goodness.

One of my friends offered to take Hannah for a couple of hours today so that I could get some stuff done. It was great of her to just offer because knowing me I probably wouldn't have asked anyone. So I've decided to try to finish painting Hannah's room. I left the walls white, but started painting flowers and butterflies a while ago. I know exactly what I want to acomplish. She has a Winnie the Pooh and Piglet on her wall too. She needs a border and some finishing touches like a tree in the closet and a little more flowers and then I will be done. So I'm really looking forward to doing that.

I was thinking I would have Brian paint the boy's room a toupe color to make it a bit warmer and then excesserize (spelling, hmmm) with a choo, choo theme. I also told Brian I needed the upstairs to be painted so that we didn't need to deal with the fumes when baby came. Poor Brian so many projects in such little time. He is a good sport though. I thought the nesting thing only happened with the first baby, but not in my case.

Hannah is down for her nap so I thought I would write a little today. I am really on a day by day basis. The baby could come today or past the due date. It is just a mystery. I am soooooo hoping he'll come before my parents get here for Thanksgiving. Wouldn't that be great!!

I'll try to write again, but who knows maybe the next time will be with a newborn in my arms!!

Ok, I Gotta Say ~

That I can't promise to write as much anymore, like I want to. It is just getting too close to "D" day and my body is just wearing down. Last weekend I went to the hospital to be monitored cuz' I had some questionable pains in my abdomen I had never felt before. They started when I was making pizza in the kitchen. Then I laid down on the couch for a bit and when I wanted to get up it was all I could do to roll off the couch. I stayed on all fours for a couple minutes, not moving because I was in pain. It kinda scared me so I called Brian to come home and give me a break so I could rest and he wanted me to get some advice from the doctor. They said to come in.

Thankfully (I think, lol) I wasn't having contractions. I just pulled some ligaments due to stretching and pulling of the uterus. I was a little disappointed that my son wasn't planning to come sooner rather than on time, but I now know to call the doctor when the contractions are realling starting or my water breaks. So relax, relax I say. mmm...

Last night I couldn't keep from falling asleep at 8:00p and getting up at 7:00am, feeling like i could have gone another hour or two. I also had an hour/half nap in the day. Crazy huh? Tonight is the same. I completely wore out after dinner. My left hip is sore and achy, my heart feels like it is racing and I am on my way to go "night, night." All I can say is that my time is very limiting right now. Wierd.

Hannah is doing good. She is a wonderful, beautiful, unreasonable little toddler. I feel like I am a 24 hour a day teacher and guidance counselor. No wonder I am worn out by days end. She has been teething and also getting over a cold. She had her 18 month check up and she's doing fine. They told us all of the shots she would need to take. Some of the risks to them are kinda scary, like the flu shot having mercury corrolates to autism, Chickenpox vaccine has a slim chance of causing seizures and maybe even death??? Did we ever have to take a vaccine for chickenpox? I thought our parents wanted us to get it young so that we would be immune to it as adults. huh. Anyway, very interesting.

Well, til' next time. I'm off to bed.

"Naps" ~

My daughter has started attaching herself to her "naps" blankies and wants to take them everywhere. It is the cutest thing. She doesn't want to call them blankets only naps. I have finally given in and started calling them this and her regular naps "night night naps." It works for her.

I have lots of housework to do today before our study guests arrive. Those bathrooms, when will I find the time to clean those??? If you have any suggestions or advice with a toddler wanting to be whereever you are, please let me know.

I have started to feel very soar and some pressure already and I am only 7 months along. Is this normal? I am going to call the nurse again to get a second opinion. It's been going on for about a week now.

Well, have a good day. I think we will too. = )

Hurry, Hurry ~

Okay, Hannah is eating her snack right now so maybe I will have some time to write something before she comes over...AH she is right here!!!! Oh know. Just kidding.

I was soooo tired last night. I went to sleep at 9:00 and didn't get out of bed until 7:00am. 10 HOURS!!! Awesome!

Brian is off to work. I've saved my chores for today and tomorrow so I will have stuff to keep myself preoccupied. I am really believing that to be true. Let's see if I follow through and self motivate myself. = )

We are teaching a bible study tomorrow. I am really looking forward to it. There will be four young couples here at our house. We will be going through the "40 Days of Community" by Rick Warren. Should be fun. I love having people over and getting a chance to connect. It is so much fun for me.

Today looks like it will be nice. I think Hannah and I will run a couple of errands before the day is through. Maybe I will leave the stroller at home and let her walk. Nope. Not ready. Maybe I will leave the stroller at home and let her walk to the mailbox with me and back. Yep I think I can handle that adventure.

Well til next time.

Where does the time go! ~

Okay, I am working up to posting something everyday. = ) I am sitting here shopping online. Ebay, craigslist, amazon, the web, I need to go get some ice cream and chill my brain. Today I feel like we have tons of money to spend. However, deep down I know the truth, I'm just denying it right now. I've also been into garage saling. I've found some fun toys for Hannah that were cheep, cheep, cheep. That is the best.

Hannah and I went for a drive to pick up a used double stroller. It was such a nice day to get out. It is in good condition and for $50.00 how could you go wrong?

Baby is kicking now. This is his time when he pretends he is able to run and jump and kick already. Should I really give him ice cream right now? hmmm... But it sounds sooo good with fudge toping. You know what I am going to choose to do right? he he.

No Topic ~

There has been so much to write about that I've just felt overwhelmed by it all. When the evening comes around I am pretty run down and so to write what's on my mind (which is always a lot lol ) looks like a daunting task. So my goal is to each day write a little summary of what went on and call it a day. = )

I am only two months away from having this baby. It's crazy. He is now starting to become a part of my life. Before I knew he was inside me, growing, but I just went on like everything was still the same as usual. Now I am 20 pounds over weight, waking up three times a night, hot as can be. He does summersults in my tummy whenever I am resting lol, I can't see my toes, when I bend down I stay down usually to get some momentum to get back up. lol. It feels like it is coming to the end now. I am excited I think and believe it or not a bit scared. You would think I would be ready to face the pain and work of labor, but I'm not. I can't believe I am putting myself through this again. It is becoming a reality more and more.

We are thinking of getting his room started soon. Have a choo choo theme picked out. It will be cute. We have already received so many awesome clothes for our little guy, I think he's all set to go. So happy about that! We are very blessed to be apart of such a great "family" of friends at our church. So blessed.

Hannah is growing and growing. I love to listen to her talk. Brian showed her how to jump the other day so she practices a lot and can now jump a half an inch in the air. She feels so proud. She has taken yogurt and rubbed it in as sunscreen lotion on her hands, arms and face. = ) She loves to read anything with writing on it in her own language. I wouldn't be surprised if she becomes a public speaker on day. We play nose kisses and just make up our own fun most of the time. I am really starting to enjoy being around her. When I let go of stress and anxiety of being the best mom and let the day play out we both relax and just have fun. On the other side of things we are dealing with hitting when mad or frusterated, screeming, and grabbing things out of our hands without saying please oh and standing up on things. Time outs have become a reality. I still can't tell if they are working, but I'm sticking to them.

Brian is doing well. Caught a cold last week and it is still lingering a bit. He rarely gets colds. He is getting excited about doing little projects around the house. He is very handy and gifted. I can't wait to see what he does. We are wanting to really focus on our family time together. I'm glad. We always enjoy being together (for the most part lol )

Well, I could go on and on and on, but I must stop. Goodnight.

I'm Back!

Hey it's been awhile. = ) I heard that there are actually people out there who are reading this. How exciting! I do apologize for taking some time off. I got lazy there and wanted to watch tv, browse the web, or sleep with the little time to myself that I've had. It finally clicked a couple of days ago that I was really wasting away my time. I don't know about you, but I get in these moods where I boycout things that I love to do, but take to much effort. How dumb.

Anyways, enough about me. Hannah has just been growing and maturing right before my very eyes. She graduated today to the 18 to 2 1/2 year old room from being in the nursery. She was a little, big girl now. I almost cried. lol. She was playing with a play kitchen and crib with baby dolls, having the greatest time. I went in to check on her, but she really didn't need me. She was having fun with her friends. lol. During one of our breakfasts last week she did the most adorable thing ever! I was feeding her yogurt and she thought it looked like sunscreen lotion so she put some on her hands, arms and face and rubbed it in so delicately. It was the cutest! How could I tell her that we eat yogurt not nurture our skin with it. = )

Tonight before bedtime I was getting ready to put her jammies on and she took my arms to get my attention, looked me in the eyes and gave me a kiss. I totally melted. Usually I ask for one and either she says "no" or she'll give me a quick one. The joys of being a mother, eh?

What words is she coming up with now? So many. She has over 50 words in her vocabulary now. Let's see: horse, all gone, open, she says "bye, bye brush" when she's done brushing her teeth, she says, "bye, bye" to her specific toys or things that she is leaving, shoes, Austi for our dog Austin, apple, orange, beep for grape, nana for banana, bark for fork, spoo for spoon, bow for bowl, dance for music and dancing, cars, trucks, plane, rain, ish for fish, crackers, aisens for raisens, crayons, gaw for draw, pen, yes, elp for help, mommy, daddy, night-night, nap for her blanket. She is also starting to put words together to tell us what she wants like: Austi, go, ball, down, for "Can we go play ball with Austin downstairs?" (I'm using this space to document all these things. Sorry if it is boring. = ) )

Hannah's personality and character is just coming out so much these days. She is definitely a joy to be with.

The other little one in my tummy is kicking most of the time. He rolls and jerks my stomach way more than Hannah ever did. I am already starting to feel the braxton hicks. Everything seems to be happening much earlier than I remembered it. I am due November 27th. I'm hoping he'll come early so my parents will be in town. I registered at the Baby Depot the other day cuz' a friend suggested it. Oh my gosh I didn't realize I hadn't even thought about a theme for his room. So I had so much fun looking at all of the bedding. TOO CUTE~

Hmmm...what else. Well we are pretty busy this month. The summer flew by and now it is on to fall. Amazing. I am actually looking forward to cooler weather. I was beginning to think I would melt away in those 90 degree days we had.

So onto another week. I'll write again sooner rather than later. Too many fun things to talk about these days. Goodnight~

We're Off ~

We are getting ready to go camping tomorrow, just the three of us and the dog. It is a much needed break to get away with just the family. We will be staying on the lake. I bought a so called maternity swim suit or should I say a large two piece. = ) I am so exited. I really want to swim and be in the water with Hannah.

I am enjoying the pregnancy right now. Baby is kicking a lot and I have a hearty appetite, mmmm......... I love this stage. I also don't have to sleep as much so I feel more productive.

Next week we'll be getting ready to go up to see my parents for a couple of weeks. Now I am excited about summer! Summer is suppose to be all about vacations, right?

Well, hope you are enjoying yours. = )

Peaches ~

Yum, peaches~ I am eating sliced peaches with ice cream..um...I mean I just ate peaches with ice cream. lol. They went by quick. This pregnancy I've been craving fruit, lots and lots of fruit. Peaches are on the top of the list. I used to be a veggie gal. I have changed my ways. = )

Summer is here and is beautiful. Brian, Hannah and I went to a nice park, played in the water and with tons of rocks. It was so nice to be together. Sometimes it is really easy for us to be focused on work, daily routines, etc that we forget to have fun.

The baby is kicking more and more. I am getting more and more fat! It feels like that anyway. I look cute in some clothes, but in others I look like a whale with a tiny head. lol. I tried telling Hannah about her baby ________ and pointed to my belly then she pointed to her belly to say that __ was in there. It was cute.

She has been very loving and needing my affection lately. She is starting to put two words together. Not a lot. Like "bye bye wa, wa" or "dada go" I find the more quality time I give her, the less screaming she voices. Go figure. I definitely have lost some MORE screws up top. I'm not at the place, though, where I am identifying with the blond jokes yet. Thank goodness.

I know it has been 10 days since I last wrote. I find it hard to write with dial-up as well as always needing to catch up on my sleep. My free time is very limited. It is split up between my husband, my daughter and now another baby. When I do find those times for myself I try to drink it all in.

Well, til next time. I hope everyone is having a good summer. Hey a note, I found out that taking a cold shower and sleeping infront of a fan does wonders to cool a pregrant person down in 90 degree weather. Just thought I would let you know. = )

Sunday ~

Well another week has gone by. Quite a few things have happened this past week that have made my emotions feel like they've been on a rollercoaster ride. Weird...

We celebrated the Fourth of July at a wonderful friend's home. They invited us to be apart of their family and made us feel very welcome. They had a panoramic view of the valley. We watched 3 to 4 different firework presentations. It was relaxing and beautiful.

Then to hear about the London bombings a couple of days later was such a contrast. My heart went from content and peaceful to perplexed and heavy. Another terrible act of hatred was displayed.

From there our little family went to the doctor's office for my checkup and ultrasound. Guess what we found out??? lol.

When we got back home my brother called from his cell asking what our exit was because they were on their way to visit. I was excited, but also wasn't ready since I thought they would show up at mid-night or the next day. They didn't care and I was able to clean up the place before too long. My nephews were the cutest. Hannah liked the company, however let them know when they were crossing her boundaries. That was funny. They stayed the night and the next day we went to the park and to lunch. After they had said their goodbyes I was so sad to see them go. There just isn't anything like family. I don't know what it is, but a deep connection and hopefully a trust that has been built over the years makes it uniquely special.

Brian and I then finished the first season of "24." I had to stay up past my bedtime to watch it. That show really pulls you in. It's amazing.

Lastly, today was church. After all of the highs and lows of this past week I found myself coming back to my constant relationship with God. No matter what happens around me or to me he never changes. His promises never change. I can count on his peace, love, and faithfulness. He has proven himself over and over again through so many things. This week I asked for peace and my heart felt peace. I asked for His comfort and my heart felt comforted. I asked for his faithfulness and he proved himself faithful. Hey, I am no saint. I forget this often and find myself farther away from him then I'd like. That is why this hit me so hard. I realized my relationship with Him was the number one most important thing in my life. I can always run to Him and give all of my emotions to him and feel peace. It was so nice to remember this today. = )

July 2nd ~

Today was my birthday. = ) Another day older, more mature and more adult. However, all of that faded into the background when my husband and I went to the city and had a date night. It was like we were newly married again and on another little adventure, discovering new things as a couple in love. We did talk about the kids, but they weren't the focus. The focus was us. I think it was a good reminder of how much we loved eachother and enjoyed eachother's company. Hannah was safe and well taken care of. I didn't need to worry at all. I really felt special today. So to be 28 is really not so bad when you spend it with the people you love who love and care about you, who know how to make you feel like you are important and cherished.

I Get Lost In The Wind ~

The steady breeze is blowing through the windows escaping down the hallway. When I feel the touch of the wind I get caught in a trance. Does that ever happen to you? It reminds me to stop and breathe. It speaks calmness into my soul and for a moment I feel like this day is going to be manageable. It whispers all of the positives that have happened during the day, reminding me to look up and get out of the slump I'm in. You can probably tell I am pretty meloncholy at times. = ) I'm telling you I find that when I am pregnant my moods exaggerate. I'm either so high on life or I'm blue and can find a million things why. This blog is not ment to be a downer. I promise there have been some wonderful times this past week that I will share. It's just I love having a place to lay my thoughts down. I need a place to be honest and real; a place to be me. Thank you.

Being at home full time has had it's ups and downs. For the most part I wouldn't change a thing. However, there are times when I feel like I am the lead character on "Groundhog Day." That is such a disturbing movie for me. Brian loves that movie. It's one of his faves. For me it makes me cringe because to do the same things over and over again is torcherous. I try to live freely with Hannah doing different things during the day, planning it as it comes. But for the most part we are managed by her sleep and eating schedules. She is such a happier baby when she goes to sleep at regular intervals throughout the day and I am much more sane, but also much more bored. I either sleep when she sleeps or try to figure out what I could do for me that would be fun.

I got hooked on the first season of 24 when Brian rented it out. I feel for any of you who had to watch only one episode at a time waiting what might have seemed an eternity til the next one. My heart is with you. We have been staying up watching like 3 or 4 episodes a night. It's a soap opera in a way, but much more intense. = ) So this has been a fun way to escape from the regular routine. I also decided to focus on the backyard, prunning and weeding. I have to be careful with my pregnancy and allergies, but Hannah plays in her playpen and I am one with nature. I'm also trying slowly to get back on the piano. I know I need to do it. I love it when I start, but it is such a struggle to get on that bench. I'm such a perfectionist and when I make too many mistakes for my liking I quit and don't want to try again. Silly huh?

We've spent some great evenings together as a family lately. Brian adores Hannah. He chases her around the house and she tries to get to "mama" because she knows "mama" will keep her safe. lol. She loves to scream for attention more and more. The books say to ignore it til this faze ends or whisper back so she can see your mouth move, but can't hear what you are saying or say 'use your inside voice' and deter her attention to something else. We're trying. Her new words are: "on", "out", "bye bye", "ovv" for off, and "bubba" for bubble, and "baba" for baby. It has been so fun to talk to her. That's our biggest thing I guess.

So the wind has subsided and I must get ready for bed. = ) I want to spend some much needed quite time with the Lord. So goodnight.

One more thing as a side note to my Aunty Mel. Please send me your email address. I would love to write back to you more. Love ya!

Hmmm...A Title ~

I could put down allergies or exhaustion again for my title, but I will spare you. lol.

Hannah and I did go to a park with some other moms for the morning. We had a nice time. The weather was suppose to be very warm, however when we got to the park the wind chill factor was like 40 degrees. = ) It was nice and sunny there. I was able to connect with some friends I haven't seen in a while.

I think Hannah is probably too young yet to really appreciate the park. She liked the swing for 5 mins and then wanted up. She slid down the slide a couple of times, but I didn't really see any excitement in her facial expression. She did, however enjoy eating the bark off the ground. She thought that was pretty funny since I kept on throwing them away and saying, 'Yuk Hannah.' What ever happened to sand? I just haven't found a sandbox she can play in yet.

I'm telling you that little outing to the park wore me out. I slept for two hours with Hannah and still had to sit on the couch like a zombie till Brian got home. He has encouraged me that I was the same way with Hannah. That makes me feel a little more normal. I've felt the baby kick a bit the past couple of days. I go in to find out what it is July 8th. We'll see. We don't really care either way. We're pretty casual about the whole thing.

Till next time. It is almost my bedtime. lol.

Costco ~

I had a nightmarish thing that happened to me at Costco the other day I thought I would share. Hannah and I had been in the house for about two straight days so I wanted to bring her along with me to Costco to give her another perspective on life. We got there, found my card, strapped her in, had my grocery list, and started loading up the cart. I was very proud of myself because I didn't stop to browse or pick up things I wanted that weren't on the list. It was a quick trip and got everything we needed. Hannah was a dream baby, just looking at everyone and everything, drinking it all in.

When we got to the register the cashier found something wrong with my card and had a gal go check it out. Hannah was on the other side of the register in the cart which made me a little nervous. The gal took about 10 mins to get back. She said that my card had expired and that I needed to get a new one before they could ring me up. I asked how this could be that I was using it for 9 months and it was fine. She said that our old church discontinued our membership the 28th of last month. I was frusterated because there was a line of people right behind us, Hannah wasn't in my arms, I did not get a notice in the mail about the change. The gal said to go to the membership area and ask if our new church has signed us up yet. I said why would they do that if our old card was working for months?

In my frusteration I took Hannah, they put my cart to the side and went to see the gal at membership. They looked up our info and found nothing. Hannah decided then to jerk and want down. I out of my embarrassment and frusteration shook her a little to get her attention to stop. I felt like one of those moms that you see in store making a scene with her child. I then started to cry, not knowing what to do. I had our dinner in the cart.

I went back to the register, told the girl they couldn't find anything. I said I don't understand how Costco could not have any flexibility with customer's that have been faithful for years? All she could say was sorry. I asked her if I could speak to a manager. I thought I would need to call later when I got back home, but she found one right away. I sat at the tables with Hannah in my arms with tears streaming down my face. I asked him how Costco couldn't look at these situations case by case. That our card has worked for four years. That when you go to Costco you more then likely fill your cart to the rim. And how embarrassing it is to get to the register at be told you can't buy anything you had just because of a exp. that happened days ago. I couldn't believe how much I was crying. He asked me how I was going to pay for it, I told him with cash. So he overrided the system for me and let me get through this one time. I was so thankful and so embarrassed. I was not out to get Costco in anyway and this whole episode took about 20 mins.

The reason why I am telling you all of this it to maybe offer some advice, some encouragement. I learned to always talk to the manager before you take no for an answer. Also, even though I love my little daughter I learned I will not take her on those kinds of outings again. = )

I need to get going, but I am hoping to write again tonight. Hope you all have a wonderful summer's day.

The Ten Things We Learned ~

1) ALWAYS pack a bag of snacks whenever you go out because you never know when you might need them.
2) Learn of alternate routes before going somewhere by yourself without a cell phone.
3) Make sure your baby is comfortable with many things to preoccupy him/her just incase you are in the car for four hours or more.
4) Try to carry some cash with you at all times, bills and change to either pay for lunch, dinner, parking or a ferry ride.
5) Never go across the water when there is a severe thunderstorm watch in affect with possible hail.
6) Find out which radio stations broadcast local news and if there isn't any, call the radio stations and demand better updates on special reports!! j/k (I didn't do that)
7) Call Portland news stations and/or the government building and ask why there isn't better coverage of top stories in our city. (I didn't do this either)
8) Have a sun visor handing for days when baby is in the sun when you are at a stand still in traffic for hours with the sun on his/her side.
9) Be kind to other drivers who want to get infront of you to try and keep the peace, unless there is a someone behind you flipping you off and yelling, "What the _____ do you think you are doing?!?!?
10) Finally, be thankful for all that God has blessed you with. That you can find hope and peace in him when unexpected things occur as well as a sense of humor.

Yesterday was a very interesting, eventful day. A good family memory.

My Little Shadow ~

I am so filled with emotions, total exhaustion, sad that I have a list of things to accomplish that never gets finished, irritable with being available to Hannah 24/7 it seems, and pregnant with a belly that keeps growing and growing and growing. BUT, what wipes away all that at the end of the day is the thought of my little shadow.

Even though being a mom is very demanding and you never know what the next day will have in store. Even though I run out of things for playtime with Hannah and get bored with the same ol' toys. Even though I clean a messy baby three times a day for meals and three or four times for diapers. And even though whenever I try to get a project done Hannah is wanting my total, complete attention. I have to say I LOVE knowing that she loves me, that our love for one another is unconditional. I love how she buries her head in my legs, how she nuzzles her nose into my neck wanting to remember my smell, how on very special occasions that only she decides she will give me a kiss and smile a loving smile, thanking me for all I've done as her mom. I know when I stop to think of those precious shadow moments time will eventially have them end. She might not even remember any of them, but I will always hold them close to my heart. She is my special shadow. I love her so much. Hmmm... I should write a song? = )

Allergies ~

Yes, allergies. Brian and I both have them pretty bad this summer. Brian wants to scratch his eyeballs out and I want to get rid of my stuffy nose. LOL. It's pretty funny actually.

Well, Hannah and I are back home now. We had a great time with my parents. I believe that when your heart and body cries "go on vacation!" you need to listen. I didn't realize how exhausted I've been lately. I took good naps there. I also didn't realize how much I missed my friends and family.

The barbacue was great. Saw lots of people. Our old house was decorated very nicely. They did a great job. I took lots of pictures to show Brian and he also agreed with me. I was able to visit with my old neighbor. Got the scoop on what was happening with the neighborhood. I had forgotten how beautiful and quiet it was where we lived. We went to church Sunday and saw so many people, choir members and staff. I put Hannah in the nursery thinking she would need me to stay with her a while to get used to the new enviornment, ah no. She barely new I was even there. That girl, she is so funny to me. Sometimes so independent. I was sad for a second and then remembered 'hey I was free for an hour, yea.' = ) I learned what I appreciated about living there and also what I appreciated about living here.

Up there I was working two jobs and Brian was working two jobs. Here I don't need to work. I really am thankful for that. We used to commute a half hour to hour a day to and from work. Here, it is less than 15 mins. I came back home with a goal to learn as much as I could about this place and go out and live an adventure. We rarely had time to do that before. I am finding out this place has lots to explore.

Hannah has been working on her words lately. She can say now, "papa", "oma", "cracka" for cracker, "nellow" for yellow, and "paboo" for peekaboo. She also has been wanting to put on her shoes BY HERSELF, put on her socks BY HERSELF, put the pacifier in her baby dolls mouth BY HERSELF, etc... If I try to help her without her permission, oh brother, I get a big tantrum. Another thing I've been teaching her is to climb up the stairs with my supervision of course. Well, I had forgotten to update Brian so when he came out of the bathroom the other day he found her up the first flight of stairs playing with the door mat. AHHH!!!! I guess she was able to do it all BY HERSELF, but how scary was that!! One more thing she started a couple of days ago was to bury her head in my legs, always wanting to be close to me. It is very flattering, but being pregnant and having a 23 lbs. baby wanting to be in your arms all the time is a bit hard on me. It seems like some moms can pull it off and have it not even faze them, ah not me. I have come to terms that I am a WIMP!! Oh well, such is life. I sure do love her and think the world of her.

I think I've been feeling the other little one kick every now and then. I am at that stage where you're thinking 'is this baby still alive?' I remember that month with Hannah, I barely felt pregnant. All I can do is just trust that everything is alright. We have our next ultrasound July 8th. Can't wait. We want to find out this time. Good planning. Hopefully the baby will cooperate. I am definitely in my maternity clothes now. Thankfully I think I have found some cute outfits to wear this summer. I don't feel like such a big fat whale anymore with maternity clothes hiding the evidence. lol.

Mini Vacation ~

Hello my dear friends and fam. We are here visiting the grandparents for the weekend. I've caught up on sleep. I haven't needed to cook any dinners. Hannah has been preoccupied with her loving and devoting "papa" and "gran...." Still can't say grandma, we're working on it though. As well as watch some movies, like "Treasure Hunt" with Nicolas Cage. Great family movie. Reminded me of "Goonies" my all time favorite treasure movie. Tonight will be "In Good Company." Looking forward to that. Everything we've done has been pretty low key, but so good for me.

Tonight we are going to a friends barbecue at their house. (We sold our old house to them) It will be great to see old friends and our old house. Brian wants me to take lots of pictures of it. Hope they won't mind. hehe. I wonder if Hannah will recognize any of it? Hmmm.... probably not. We'll see.

Well, hope you all have a great rest of the week. I'll let you know how everything went when we get back.

I Lift My Eyes ~

That is what I've been wanting to do all day long. Lift my eyes to the Lord. Today has been a 'full of all sorts of emotions' day. My mom said that I had to remember that I am more hormonal now in my pregnancy. I sure hope she is right.

I've been dealing with a lot of things lately. When to be a crusader and when to be a listener, when to intervine and when to step out of a situation, when to open myself freely to people and when to let time reveal who I am? Without getting into too much detail, I hope that makes sense.

I've also really been missing my parents lately and am thinking Hannah and I will pay them a visit this week. I am not looking forward to the trip part of it, but I am thinking it would be a good thing for us to do.

On a lighter note, I've been wondering for a while now what does 2T, 4T, etc... actually mean? I bought some things that were 2T and they barely fit Hannah. I thought they were ment to be for 2 year olds??? So confused.

Also, I asked my friend if she worried about bringing up her little one in a certain way so that she would grow up to be a good person? Because I do. And she said something that I never even considered. She said, "no" that since her and her siblings turned out okay she felt that her baby would probably do the same thing with following her mother's example as a guide. I loved that. I am going to try to think that way more.

I better go, but I will leave you with a part of a song Susan Ashton sang that has been playing over and over in my head. And has been a constant comfort to me.

"I lift my eyes to the hills
For where does my help come?
My help it comes from the Lord
Who made heaven and earth.
He will not let my foot be moved.
He who keeps me will not slumber.
Behold who keeps Israel
Will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is my keeper
The Lord is the strength on my right hand.
The sun shall not hurt me
By day nor the moon by night
The Lord is my keeper
The Lord is the shade on my right hand.
The Lord is my keeper
From this time forth and forever more."

Belated Sunday ~

I so wanted to write again. It's been too long in my opinion. We decided to get dial-up, but are afraid now to use it in the evening in case it wakes Hannah up! Oh brother! So this morning I asked Brian if he would watch Hannah while I did my blog. I close the door thinking this would be a great time to formulate my thoughts about the past couple of days however, my wonderful little girl is outside the door crying. Where did my solace go? I'll have to be creative and find it another way.

Okay, she's calmed down a bit. I think maybe I can start to write again. Let's see... Honestly, I don't remember too much from Friday to Saturday, but Sunday was a great day. The message at church was probably one of my favorites that I have heard in a very long time. It talked about Isaiah 30:15, being quiet with the Lord, allowing him to show you who you are. Resting in the Lord and finding your strength.

Being quiet is a very scary thing for me. Either my mind is still racing with thoughts and prayers or I fall asleep! lol! During my time with God I am usually the one talking. Another thing that scares me is that I won't be productive. I'll have so many things on my list to get done that I will feel guilty sitting by myself for a long period of time just being quiet. I really want to try this though. I think what I'm going to do is when Hannah goes to bed, go find a quiet place to sit and listen for hmm... I'll try 10-15 mins. for starts. See what happens. The message really challenged me. I loved that.

Brian and I got a wonderful treat as well. We found a babysitter for Hannah and went out on an official date! We so wanted to see "Star Wars," but it was all sold out when we got there. Bummer!! I told myself that I wasn't going to be disappointed so we decided to go out to eat to a restaurant I had been eyeing for a while. It had great ambiance, the food was okay. I did like the chips and salsa though. We sat and talked for a long time, really enjoying each other's company once again. I don't know about Brian, but I needed so much to remember what it was like when it was just us. We decided that we needed to try to make the time to go out once a month together. Now that we have some great people to take care of Hannah I feel much more comfortable with that.

Well, I still haven't ventured out and tried any of those recipes for Hannah yet. Maybe next week. (can you tell I am a procrastinator?) I have been a bit more busy in the kitchen though. Since my pregnancy I've despised store bought bread. I can taste the sugar and the gluten and it makes me cringe. So now that I am feeling better, I've decided to make my own 100% whole wheat bread from scratch. It was soooooo yummy! Since I already was using my mixer and all of the ingredients I thought hmmm... why not make some homemade rolls too! They were super easy to make and taste just like what my grandma used to make. It was great. Made me reminisce of all the wonderful times I had at my grandparents house. Grandpa made homemade root beer (you can't make anymore), Grandma made kuchen, poppyseed bread, homemade bread, rolls, homemade soups, fresh fruits and veggies from their garden, and homemade ice cream. She was my role model for sure. She knew how to cook, clean, sew, knit, crochet, stitch, paint, play the piano, sing, I could go on and on and on. I really do miss her. She was the one who started me on garage saling too. he he.

Anyway, off on a bit of a tangent. Oh yeah, so I had some time to sit down Saturday and plan out the meals for the week. Went to the store and got everything I needed. (you must know that this is a HUGE learning experience for me, I never know what I am going to cook the next day our meals are pretty sad actually) Sunday I had a pot roast in the slow-cooker and we had a great lunch ready after church. 1 point for mommy! So we'll see how the rest of the week plays out. lol.